A Love- Hate Relationship

I believe I'm developing a love-hate relationship with New Year's. Along with Thanksgiving and Christmas, it's another of my favorite holidays. But New Year's always comes with a promise of something greater - a chance to make things right, to do away with the old and all things you dislike about yourself and to make a better you (and me!).

But, by liking this idea so much, you have to imagine the disappointment and anger I felt inward this morning to spend most of it with a ball-watching 4 year old. That would be the New Year's Eve ball, a ball that dropped about 4 hours after what should have been bedtime. It was my mistake really, to think that we could pull it off with no regret. We had a great plan - dinner at a local Mexican restaurant, a stop off at video rental for the Batman game and Prince Caspian (super special treat around this house), then home in time to take the tree down (note all other Christmas decorations are still around... yikes), and for the grand finale, a camp out in the living room for movies, games, and to see that darn ball drop. I finished it off with sparking grape juice toast, which was a hit. Although I may have trouble tomorrow when Aiden tells his class he drank wine as he kept calling it.

But when I wanted things to be so right this morning, they went so wrong. It seems to go this way almost every year - not necessarily right away, I try my best to make a new start, but seem to fail year after year. I am not in the 23 odd percent of people who can keep their New Year's Resolutions. If you ask me 23% is a little high... But I continue to make them - continue to strive for some form of perfection.

So, what is my resolution this year, you ask? I'm terrible, no wonder I fail. I make a bunch with the hopes that one will stick. I make it complicated, but then again it's not. But here's the big one, one that has been weighing on me since the death of my grandmother in November: I want to be intentional and purposeful in my actions and in my thoughts. I want to be proactive on a daily basis - this means order and organization and cleanliness. At the risk of sounding like Bridget Jones, I want to lose 30 pounds, no I NEED to lose thirty pounds - My plan: To exercise 30 minutes a day and to retire my carbosoris tendencies. Cook more, eat out less. Continue to chose more nutritious and natural foods for my family. And somehow try to find a balance between work and being a mom and wife. This last one has been a struggle lately. More than ever I want to be home. So, wish me luck. Next year I'll go for world peace, it might be easier to accomplish.

Oh, and one blogging resolution: You're excited, aren't you? Stop stalking other bloggers. I'm going to leave a message to let you know I've been.

And by the way, the New Year's Eve fairy left some little boy with a mild case of the dreaded pink eye... I might get one more day off after all...